UHell Press Pushcart Prize Nominations

We are proud to announce our nominations for the Pushcart Prize. It was difficult choosing which pieces to nominate from among these four outstanding books. Congratulations to our nominees and their nominations (click the arrows to read each piece):

Eirean Bradley (from The Little Big Book of Go Kill Yourself)

the population of glendale, az dropped by one person for nine hours in the spring of 1989

the population of glendale, az dropped by one person for nine hours in the spring of 1989

when I was 13
I committed suicide.

this was not an attempt.

I popped all 87 sominex
that I had stolen from albertsons
one at a time.

I let my tongue memorize
the smoothness of each capsule.

my mouth so full,
that even if a cry for help was to
happen
no one would have heard it.

I tucked myself in
and laid the note across my chest
under my not-trembling chin
after the proofreading was done.

I did not want to be misunderstood.

I did not want sloppy syntax
to cause undue pain.

I slipped off silently.

I did not dream.

when my eyes opened the next day,
relief was not the correct word,
neither was regret.

I hid the note
and joined my parents at the
breakfast table.

I said very little, but was not
impolite.
I made as little eye contact as
possible.

I didn’t want my father
to see the new man I had become.

Calvero (from someday i’m going to marry Katy Perry)

energy drinks and diet sodas

energy drinks and diet sodas

I like energy drinks.
    I like diet sodas too.

They both taste good
and therefore I drink both of them
quite frequently,
    especially diet soda.

Because I drink so many
energy drinks
    and because I drink
        so many diet sodas
I have to pee quite a bit
throughout the day.

Pissing so much
throughout the day
might annoy most people
but I really don’t mind it.
    I don’t mind it at all
        actually.

I like taking pisses,
    especially long ones.

Sometimes when I have to pee
I hold it in
for as long as I can.
This way my pisses last longer
coming out.
I like taking long pisses.
They feel extra good
as they spray out of me
and into the toilet.

I spend most of my day
feeling nothing at all,
and when I do finally feel something
it’s usually something
pretty horrible like
sadness,
frustration,
hopelessness,
embarrassment,
aggravation,
anxiety,
shame,
dread.

But the long pisses make me feel good.
    They’re an amazing release.
They’re like a longer
but much more mild orgasm.
Plus I don’t have to chase
or beg
or buy some girl dinner
or drinks
to get one.
That and I don’t need to repay the favor
and have my face
stuck between her legs
for forty-five minutes,
tracing designs
all over her crotch
with the tip of my tongue
as she squirms
and writhes
and continually tells me how close she is.
    (I’m either really bad at it
    or really good at it.
    I’m not sure yet
    which one
    though.)

No,
all I need to do
to feel good
when I don’t have any other reason
to feel good
is drink an energy drink
    or a diet soda
and then eventually
I’ll take a piss
and feel good again
inside.

It’s never much
and it never lasts for long
but only when you’re able
to find small amounts
of happiness
loitering in the shadows
and cowering in the darkness
will you ever be able to find it
anywhere else.

That’s why I drink
energy drinks
and diet sodas.

    That and they taste
        really good
            too.

Brian S. Ellis (from American Dust Revisited)

The Things I Don’t Have

The Things I Don’t Have

Hunger does all the writing.
Hunger is the hardest worker.
Hunger is the only part of me clean-shaven.

At night, Hunger sits on my chest.
Stares into my open mouth,
paws my face like a cat.
Wakes me up from dreams about coffee
asks, Why are we so poor?

We are poor because we are defined
by what we don’t have.
The poor paint their mirror-selves
in the ichor of nothing.

At night we wander hallways of kitchens.
Every door is a dead refrigerator filled with teeth.
Hunger is always willing to walk with me.
He asks, Is the opposite of parents sex? Or children?

The opposite of parents is strangers
who take our names.
People who use up the color
of the words that mean us.
Who make our names hollow.
The way that some make the word love hollow.

I make everything hollow.
Hunger tells me,
It is my magic. I make everything taste beautiful.
He gives me a handful of teeth,
I swallow them all at once
each incisor and molar bursting into sand as I chew.

I will always be your friend.
When all else leaves you.

Hunger smiles,
removing my right hand
and climbing back into my mouth.

Leah Noble Davidson (from Poetic Scientifica)

have

have

The depression begins with you fingering hand towels you can’t afford in a store you’ll never remember the name of because you’re consumed with how they remind you of the ones you dried the dishes with when you quit working to stay home with the baby while he started his career at the job that you got for him so he wouldn’t have to work nights at the bookstore, pretended to be him, wrote the résumé and answered the emails. You researched how to ace an interview, picked out and ironed his clothes.

He could buy you these towels if you hadn’t left because he threw you across the kitchen floor, told you how much you owed him, but that money is for flowers now, for a woman much prettier than you, someone he’s learned to be thankful for.

Pushcart_Prize_Nominations

An Evening with University of Hell Press

TONIGHT! (April 4th, 2013)

Spend an evening with University of Hell Press at Powell’s on Hawthorne (3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd, Portland, Oregon 97214). Starts at 7:30pm and is FREE.

University of Hell Press founder Greg Gerding shares stories about the press and UHell’s authors Eirean Bradley, Stephen M. Park, Leah Noble Davidson, and Brian S. Ellis read selections from their books. For more information, CLICK HERE.

Book Release Party for “the I in team”

On Tuesday, January 31st, 2012, Eirean Bradley and University of Hell Press is having a book release party at Backspace (115 NW 5th Ave, Portland 97209 www.backspace.bz 503-248-2900) celebrating Eirean’s book the I in team. Show begins at 7:00pm, suggested donation $5.


Poster Art by Deanna Liceaga

Other performers include: Mike McGee (two-time National Poetry Slam Champion), Matty Byloos (co-founder of Smalldoggies Magazine and reading series), Mindy Nettifee (Write Bloody Press, Author of Rise of The Trust Fall), Robyn Bateman (2011 Portland Poetry Slam City Champ), Will Stanford, Ansel Appleton, Laura Houlberg, and more.

Come meet the man himself, Eirean Bradley, in person, buy his book, and make him sign it.

For more information, CLICK HERE.

“the I in team” Now Available

We are excited to announce that our latest book by Eirean Bradley, the I in team, is now available.

If you live in Portland, you should plan to attend Eirean’s book release party at Backspace on Tuesday night, January 31st, 2012. Eirean will be reading, selling, and signing his books there. Additional performers and at least one band will also be participating in the celebration.

If you are unable to attend, you can go to Powell’s Books on Burnside NOW and get your copy.

Read selections from the book and find out where you can buy it online HERE.

Interview with Eirean Bradley

by Johnny No Bueno

I was asked by Greg Gerding to interview Eirean Bradley for the new University of Hell Press website. I jumped at the chance, because not only do I consider Eirean Bradley to be one of my close friends, he is also one of the few people in this town whom I trust and whose viewpoints I highly respect. The first time I performed at the Portland Poetry Slam, not without my own major misgivings of slam poetry in general, Bradley complimented my work and made me feel very welcome. He was actually the only person who talked to me that night. So I kept going back to the slam and getting more and more involved in what was going on. The relationships I most cherish these days have all been fostered at the Portland Poetry Slam, and it is hard for me to separate the slam from Eirean. He is also the person closest to my age and subculture, which really helps a 30something feel comfortable in such a youth-driven culture.

Being overwhelmed as a 31-year-old man, with what being in school for the first time in 19 years can be, I dragged myself from bed and came down to Backspace, the coffeeshop in Portland, Oregon where we have the Poetry Slam, to meet Eirean for the interview maybe 30 minutes after waking up on a long overdue Saturday. When I got down here, Eirean took me outside and told me how the night prior he woke up in the middle of the night which such intense chest pains, he eventually went to the hospital with fear it was a heart attack. Come to find out he has three ulcers. And here was this champ, who is a dear friend of mine, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready for our interview.

Eirean’s stubborn bullheadedness might come off unsettling to some, but the growing number of poets in the vibrant Portland poetry community is a testament to this man’s drive and determination to create a space for everyone. He may not be appreciated by everyone, but if they come to the Portland Poetry Slam, they are taking direct benefit of what Eirean has done for this town, and for the Portland Poetry Slam, after taking it over, around two years ago. One would be amazed at our weekly, hundred-plus crowd, one of the biggest in the world, if they were told it is only two years old. Somebody is putting a lot of hours in, behind the scenes, to create such a welcoming and vibrant weekly event. Here he is:

Continue reading Interview with Eirean Bradley

“the I in team” Cover Art Preview

We are very excited to unveil the cover art for Eirean Bradley‘s book the I in team published by University of Hell Press and coming out in stores soon. We will post when and where it will be available. Plus, there will be personal appearances by Eirean in celebration of its release.

Cover art by our very talented Vince Norris. The two photos that appear on the cover are from Greg Gerding’s own personal collection.

Eirean Bradley’s Book “the I in team”

Final editing of Eirean Bradley’s book “the I in team” has just been completed. It passed through both of our illustrious editors and our slacker founder. Next up, it goes to our graphic designer for layout and cover art. Stay tuned… we will be teasing you with excerpts from Bradley’s book right here. In the meantime, please enjoy this video of a performance by Bradley in May.

Eirean Bradley on Big Cities at Secret Society, 5.12.11

Video shot by Dee Madden.